Hell, I know thee well
by Paradoxiae
Summary: Because nothing was okay. I loved him and he made death so apparent. (S/S) (Post war timeline)


_The first time I came in contact with death was the moment I came out the womb. My mother was travelling when her water broke. Fetal distress was the general term at the time. Cephalopelvic Disproportion or CPD would be more precise for my mother's case. Basically the baby's head is too big to pass through the mother's pelvis._

 _Yeah, that's right. My forehead was causing problems before I had even made into the world. Fortunately, there was a med nin in the next town who knew how to perform C-sections properly._

"So we are all in agreement, we keep the alliance that we've established during the war."

The Hokage looked slowly around the small room containing the four other nation's leaders. Battle weary, yet victorious. The other kage all nodded their head to show their agreement on the matter. They all mentally sighed in relief despite it being the obvious decision.

"Is there any reason to believe that the Akatsuki have any surviving members?" That question came from the Mizukage.

"No they're all buried six feet under! Where they BELONG!" The Raikage bellowed slamming his fist violently upon the table. The others around the room did not seem perturbed by that action.

"As the Raikage uniquely put it, yes all reports point to every member is deceased including their leader…" The Kazekage paused, "Uchiha Obito."

The Mizukage said nothing veering to simply place her chin to her hand, looking thoughtful. The Hokage spoke up again. "And as for treatment, the medical team has deemed everyone is fit to travel."

"It's about damn time." The Tsuchikage grumbled in which the Raikage seemed to agree. The short, older man stood up and grabbed his belongings while the others followed suit. Exiting the tent one by one they came to stand next to each over overlooking the vast gathering of shinobi. But that vast amount wasn't nearly the quantity they had come with.

The Kazekage cleared his throat. The murmurs and whispers ceased instantly.

"We're going home!"

 _The first time I recognized what death was when my grandfather died. I was six. He said he was living on borrowed time a time or two and I didn't understand. He smelled of smoke and peppermint, gave me pieces of chocolate when my grandmother had told me no and she wasn't looking. I liked to pretend that he was on a long trip and that someday he would return._

Sakura sighed softly as she brought a gloved hand to her face in attempt to wipe the bead of sweat that had cascaded into her eye. They had been running for two and a half days now without a break. She pondered why she agreed to travel with the two people that had a bottomless pit of energy.

"Wow Sakura, you sure are getting slow in your old age." A voice floated into her ear coming from beside her. The body containing the voice easily side stepped her half-hearted swipe to the head as silver hair disappeared and darted ahead. Okay make that three people.

She growled lowly and propelled herself off the next branch she landed on with a burst of speed. Using the momentum, she continued to do this off similar branches and trunks until she landed quite a few paces ahead of them.

"Oi Sakura-chan! You trying to race or something? Sai here is no fun at all." Naruto pouted making his whiskers slouch slightly.

"I find it illogical to use my reserves for such a menial task when we still have many days separating us from Konoha." Sai wore his smile as he added, "Dickless."

Before an argument could be had the pink haired girl intervened, "Alright, how about this! Last one to the border has to cook dinner for the rest of-… WAIT I DIDN'T SAY GO DAMN IT!"

 _The first time I witnessed death with my own eyes was when I was twelve. I was on a mission with my new genin team in route to the Land of Waves. My knees had knocked together when I had stood in front of our escort. But I was ready to drive a kunai into any enemy that approached._

 _I realized my disadvantage when I couldn't even see them let alone attack them. One had sprung at me and I couldn't tell you what happened next, who exactly killed him. I just saw as his mouth opened in a silent scream and his brown eyes swiveled to the back of his head. That was just the first of many on that mission. I didn't sleep soundly for weeks._

"I don't like to cook, that's why ugly."

"Yamato-senpai would've run a fair race, why did he have to go with the other group…"

The pink haired grumbled under her breath about the stupid male species and cheating as she roasted fish over the fire and listened to Sai's explanation as to why he ran ahead as well. The others were situated around her doing their normal respective annoying habits. Kakashi was reading, Naruto was stuffing his face and Sai was asking about social norms of some sort. It was just like old times.

Except it wasn't like that at all.

"I wish Sasuke was here." Naruto said quietly as he ceased eating. Silence from the others was his response as something odd hung in the air. The only sound was the cicadas humming softly through the forest. Sai decided to break that silence.

"Well seeing as how he was an enemy force for such a long time, he had to be taken into custody and travel with Anbu while being drained of chakra due to-"

"I know WHY he can't be here dumb ass! I just said I wish he could be!" Naruto yelled back and Kakashi cut in, "It's okay Naruto, he didn't mean it and you'll see him soon in Konoha. We'll all be home soon."

The blonde whiskered man quieted his defensive before looking over to his only female teammate, smiling brightly.

"Yeah that's true. We're all together, ne Sakura-chan?" She smiled stiffly.

Sakura stayed eerily quiet as the conversation continued.

 _The first time I caused death was when I was 15. I was on a simple reconnaissance mission with the ShikaInoChoji trio when we accidentally stumbled upon enemy nin. I had looked over to check on Ino when the enemy I was fighting swiped at me, grazing and burning my shoulder with a fire ninjustsu. In reflex my chakra laced hand shot out. When I looked over a hole had appeared where his stomach was supposed to be. His eyes were blue. I slept fine._

The gates of Konoha seemed to gleam brilliantly in the distance as the sun rise began to strike rays onto the sleeping village. The rambunctious blonde in the group whooped loudly at the sight and began chattering even more eagerly.

Sakura looked at her friend who was walking silently on next to her and whose team had met some ways after the border, "Hey… do you want me to go to flower shop with you? That's where your mom is right?"

Ino didn't look at her but continued walking on. A moment or two passed when she suddenly reached down and grabbed the other girl's hand. She squeezed and Sakura seemed to understand.

 _The first time I thought death had finally lay claim on me I was 17. We were in a war and we had lost so many but we had won. We still had one more boy to save, one I thought I loved. But that boy shoved a fist full of lightning through my chest. And he did it again. And again. And again. And I thought I had been sent to hell. But then I woke up. And I started realizing that this world was the hell._


End file.
